My Sister’s Sister - episode 213
Yes, she is my sister’s sister. How does that work? Well, my sister and I share a father but not a mother. Her mother went on to have two more kids with a different man and that’s how she is my sister’s sister. Not related by blood, recently introduced, I’ve come to appreciate all that Amy Schadt is doing to help women transition into feeling fully empowered. She calls it Radical Embodiment. She’s been through it herself and now wants other women to reach their full potential. Amy walks us through a four-step process to get there. Why would you settle for less than all you can be when you can dream of being more?
Fun. Open. Sassy.
— Amy Schadt
“You Have a Sister”
Thoughts from My Sister’s Sister
If you’ve ever watched a soap opera, or know anything about their plot lines, you know inevitably someone finds out they have a sibling they did not previously know they had. I always thought that was near impossible. How could you not know? Well, it turns out it is indeed very possible. And in fact as I describe above it happened in our family. When I was twenty-one my dad took me out for dinner. That in and of itself was a rarity, but I was game for the outing. He proceeded to tell me he had heard from a young woman who had recently turned 18. Her mother had been telling her for years her father was someone other than the man her mother was currently married to. She further added that when she turned eighteen she could reach out to him, and that is exactly what she did.
Of course I was surprised, who wouldn’t be? We share a father but not a mother, obviously. Arrangements were made and she would come to San Diego to meet us all. I will never forget looking at her for the first time and instantly noticing she looked more like my dad than either my brother or I did. I knew it was true, of course. Not that I questioned it but seeing the resemblance really sealed it. It turns out she was raised in a nearby town, and was currently living in Los Angeles. Wow, you just never know, right?
Well, it gets even more interesting. My name as you know is Rechelle. Her name is Rachel. Pretty close wouldn’t you say? And she is three years younger than me. Hmmm. And when I asked my mom if she knew she said that yes she did. I asked her why she didn’t tell us, and she shared it was his story to tell, not hers. That makes sense. Rachel requested to meet my mom. (Ok, to share one detail: my dad had an affair while he was married to my mom. We don’t have to dwell on this but it helps the story make more sense if you know that.) My mom agreed and when she opened the door to her house, meeting Rachel for the first time, she said, Rechelle has always wanted a sister, and welcomed her with open arms. I have never loved my mother more than I did at that moment. Grace personified. Wow. Just wow.
Through all the ensuing years Rachel and I have stayed mostly connected. In more recent years she and our brother David have gotten close as they share many of the same views. I appreciate their philosophies but don’t always agree with them. Isn’t that the way of families? It’s probably more unusual to agree with your loved ones in all their opinions. I think there were assumptions where we lumped each other into categories that may or may not fully fit. That’s the tricky part. You need to take the time to connect and really find out. Of course that’s only if you are interested in forging ahead to a quality relationship. And I am.
My brother and I recently had a heart-to-heart lunch. All the cards on the table. We were both able to dispel some of the assumptions we held about each other and agreed to move ahead to genuine connection. As for Rachel, she came out from New Mexico where she is living to attend our brother’s recent wedding. It was wonderful to see her again, and that is where I got reacquainted with her sister, Amy. Life is full of surprises, isn’t it? And full disclosure: we have another brother through my dad, and the woman he was married to for years. So another half. He’s actually younger than Shaun, so there’s that. You never know what your family tree might look like.
The surprises in your family tree may bring new opportunities.
— RCN
Rachel and me at David and Kristi’s wedding
