A Passionate Artist of Story - Episode 32
Have you ever noticed how drawn to stories we are? There is something about listening to another’s experience that inspires, emboldens and moves us, hopefully to empathy, even action. Our guest today is Mary Ann who understands, quite well, the power of story. She has an abundance of experience in coming alongside people to share their story in a professional setting and more recently on a personal level. She loves it. It is her passion.
There is much we can learn from each other. We can opt to share and to listen. If you have the opportunity: tell your story. Do it in an authentic way. Be you. As Mary Ann says, We all have a story someone needs to hear.
Encourager. Trusting. Insightful.
— Mary Ann
A Part of Mine
Thoughts from A Passionate Artist of Story
Which part of my story do I tell? Which chapter? Hmmm. I am preparing to be a speaker at a pilot-workshop for women so I think I will “test” out this story on you.
I have three children and three step-children. Yes, that equals six and sounds a lot like the Brady Bunch which some of you are far too young to know. (Dad with three boys marries mom with three girls. Very catching opening song back when TV shows had lyrics. Some of us could sing it for you easily. Not well probably, but easily.)
My portion of the workshop has to do with purpose and calling. (Michelle spoke to this in episode 12, A Hippy at Heart.) I chose to use the births of my children as a place to define my purpose and calling for each one. Now why would I do that? Typically these are the happiest of times, filled with joy, anticipation and excitement.
Unfortunately this was not the case for me. I share this not to be oh poor me, or with an ounce of regret, but with the reality of how it was. Each of my children came to me in very painful, agonizing situations. And yes, there was a great measure of joy as well. How could there not be? Growing a baby, having a baby, is a wondrous thing.
Let’s start with child #1. I was a single woman who became pregnant by a boyfriend. I told him he could have 0-100% involvement and that would be up to him and I would respect his choice. This story gets a bit complicated so let me hit the high points. We went from being in a relationship, to being engaged (his idea), to a broken engagement (his idea) to breaking up entirely (his idea). Ok, I get it. Two young people not really ready. My mantra was found in an article from People magazine of all places, Unhappiness is the ultimate form of self-indulgence. I wrote it out and put it on my bulletin-board where I could see it every day.
What was my purpose? As Michelle defined it, purpose is the thing I have to give to others. And I get two words to complete this exercise, to distill it down. My purpose: Recognize truth. So I accepted his ‘not readiness’ and hit the high road for all to see. Genuinely, not in pretense. What was my calling? Defined as what others receive. My calling: Positive focus. I read the quote daily. Along with support from some close friends and family, not to mention God’s luxurious grace, I kept my focus positive. Authentically so, even though I was also in searing pain.
Child #2. I am now part of a blended family. Partway through my pregnancy we were told our son had a lethal heart defect and would die soon after birth. My husband was very clear: we were to enjoy the time of a swelling belly and let come the inevitable. We were both in agreement and in a place of acceptance. We did not ask why? There is nothing wrong with the question we just didn’t ask it. Baby was born and ended up having open heart surgery, stayed in the hospital six weeks and came home for six weeks. Now that was a miracle! Yet he died on his 92nd day of life. We had a lot of eyes on us as I was a teacher, we had four children watching, along with family and friends. My purpose: Endure well. (A big thanks to Julie for instilling that mantra in me.) That is what I had to give. Really all I had to give. Showing I could grieve but not be bitter. Showing I had faith even if I didn’t understand the why of it. My calling: Hopeful acceptance. This is what others could see, and receive from me. The verse to get me through: For we know that God causes all things to work together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28.
Child #3. We were unable to have another child. This was a heartbreak for us both as it had long been a desire to have a child together, one we could raise in the way we had always hoped for. Cut to two years of going through the foster-to-adopt program. After many months of silence we got “the call” there was a baby daughter for us. Yes, this was a happy occasion! But there would be more to the story. This baby had special needs so while we were over the moon with happiness we also needed to brace ourselves for what lie ahead. It was real. It was hard. My purpose: Healthy home. My calling: Love well. The verse: Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not keep a record of wrongs. A paraphrase of 1 Cor. 13.
I could flesh out, and go into so much more detail to fully express these chapters and many more. What I learned through this exercise is, at least for me, I can look at purpose and calling and apply it to any, and every part of my life. (Expanding past the obvious ministry aspect.) I was surprised at the impact each pair of words had on me, how they defined and symbolized those parts of my life. There is something about this examination that is informing, insightful and inspiring. Give it a try. See what you think.
What about now? What is my purpose and calling today? That’s simple. It’s YOU.
My purpose: Encourage authenticity. My calling: Empower revelation.
— Rechelle
