Choose Your Hard: Because Easy Isn't Always Better - episode 313
How many opportunities have you talked yourself out of before you even started?
We call it being practical. Being realistic. Knowing our limitations. But sometimes it's just fear dressed up as wisdom or thought work that needs cleaning up.
This young woman has said yes to a full life. Danae Cosman, is a Christian life coach for parents of newborns, a homeschooling mom of five, and someone who describes herself as optimistic, friendly, and adventurous.
With Danae we are exploring what it means to ‘choose your hard’ and be grateful, that your hobbies don’t have to be visible, and that not one of us is a mere mortal.
Having a full life does not come wrapped up in a bow. There is growth in the uncomfortable. Just ask the butterfly.
You don't have to be fearless to move forward. You just have to be willing. And maybe that next yes will change more than you could imagine. There is only way to find out.
Danae is our guest this week. We are in the series Now What, God? Discovering Your Next Assignment.
This is Unabashed You. Let's talk.
Optimistic. Friendly. Adventurous
— Danae Cosman
Are There ‘Mistakes’?
Thoughts from Choose Your Hard: Because Easy Isn't Always Better
As mentioned, Danae and I were in the same coach-training cohort. At our ‘graduation’ we had a keynote speaker and she said something three different times, and each time she said it I had a hmmmm reaction. Hmmm, as I tried it on in my mind. What do I think of that? She said, There are no mistakes. I actually wrote in my notes, I think that’s a thought and I don’t agree.
Each time she said it I felt stronger in my disagreement. So why? Why don’t I agree with that statement? At the lunch they provided for us that day, I mentioned it to a woman that I’ve had periodic philosophic discussions with (shoutout to Becky), What do you think of that? We got to talking about it and even continued our conversation via text several days later. It was incredible food for thought for both of us.
What do you think? Are there mistakes? I think the speaker’s point, without putting words in her mouth, was that things unfold and we make the best of it because we are human, not perfect. And then there are the times we don’t make the best of it. (That’s a whole different blog. Back to this one.)
I don’t agree with the statement because we do make mistakes. We exercise our free will in ways that don’t serve us or those around us. Hopefully we continue to progress forward, never perfect.
In our text thread Becky and I shared words, and their definitions to unpack them.
So what is a mistake?
mistake - an action, decision, or judgment that is wrong, incorrect, or produces an unintended result
That brought us to the word sin and if you know me, you know how I feel about that word, not what it means but the way it has been weaponized.
sin - a violation of moral or religious law, an act of rebellion or disobedience against God, or missing the standard of perfection set by God
The word I far prefer is found in the original languages.
hamartia - ‘missing the mark’ Hebrew and Greek (hata and hamartia), sin means falling short of a goal, specifically failing to love or honor God. (Like when an archer aims his bow but the shot misses the mark.)
You could look at all three of these words: mistake, sin, hamartia as clear cut synonyms. I don’t happen to see it that way. There is a nuance that these definitions do not cover. Check out this TedTalk The Forgotten Tradition of Sin by Colby Martin if you’re curious about wanting to take a deeper dive. I think his take is accurate. At least it is for me.
So where did this text exchange land after Becky and I had a few rounds of sharing ideas about wordplay, definitions and what it all meant to us? As women of faith, we came up with a resounding, Yes we make mistakes and that is exactly why we need God. Full stop. Mic drop. The fat lady has sung.
You know the cool thing about all of this? The speaker was making the point that we get to choose, we can just decide. She’s right. I do get to choose. And so do you. I know I have free will. I know I make mistakes. I know I am forgiven. I know God is growing me through it all. He makes good out of it. He can’t help himself; it’s who he is.
Yes, it’s the ‘next thing you do’ that builds, and reveals, your character.
— Amen
