Explore More of YOU: Emotional Intelligence - episode 130
I’d always wondered about “emotional intelligence” as in what exactly does that mean. In recent years we started hearing that phrase - a lot. Turns out it was coined in 1990 by two psychology professors who wrote a book about it. The concept took off. Hillary and I decided to take a deeper look to see how we rated on this scale. The one we used is https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/ei-quiz.ht.
We appreciate how this tool was broken down and organized. Easy to use, easy to go back and refer to. (Remember we both score high in administration.) The five characteristics of self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills supported what Hillary and I knew, giving it words, making it clearer. It also pointed out areas we want to grow in, definitely. All this as a way to better understand ourselves. It matters who you are because you need to show up as exactly that. For you. For me. For us.
Emotions are a source of information for learning.
— Joseph Ledoux
(Here you learn that we are both playful. Hillary is showing ‘social skills’ with Sparky and Dash, while I am displaying ‘empathy’ as I am feeding the doll during a COVID FaceTime call with our granddaughter. These are two of the five characteristics of emotional intelligence.)
A Playful Way to You See Yourself
Thoughts from Explore More of YOU: Emotional Intelligence
Let’s play a game to head into the blog for this week. We found it at https://psych2go.net/animal-quiz-how-people-see-you/. (I’ve played it and it was called something else, The Russian Animal Game. No idea where that title came from because it couldn’t be found under that name.) It’s actually called The Animal Quiz and that name feels better. To start, answer these three questions.
Your favorite animal.
An animal you’d prefer as a pet.
Your second favorite animal (wild or domesticated).
This is where the ‘self-awareness’ characteristic of emotional intelligence comes in. Each of these choices indicates (supposedly) something about you.
This animal describes who you really are.
This animal is how people see you.
This animal is how you see yourself.
The site lists +27 animals each with a brief description. You can compare your chosen three animals with the list and see how it all feels. Let’s use my answers as an example.
Dolphin
Golden Retriever
Chimpanzee
Let’s see what is said about each one.
Dolphin - if the animal is not listed, that means you are unique. It is hard for others to define you.
Golden Retriever - a dog is loyal, humble and brave. You are protective, friendly and submissive at times.
Chimpanzee - a monkey has a confident, cheerful and funny personality. You are practical but skillful and versatile.
How does this stack up with how I see myself? Actually pretty well. I like to think I am most of the attributes listed here. Let’s face it, they are mostly positive! ‘Submissive’ though…hmmm. Not so sure about that one. It’s one of those trigger words. I often find myself going to this site https://www.thesaurus.com to remind myself how words are defined and also to choose a synonym. Here I would exchange ‘submissive’ for ‘dutiful’ as it indicates a kind of honor that goes with it. Yes, I will claim that for sure.
We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.
— George Bernard Shaw
