Finding Your People - Episode 38
Heather is an intellectual woman, amongst other things, who shares what she has learned about finding your people, and why it is so important. Doing life with people that you are close to, trust, are safe with to be yourself, and love you unconditionally. And you feel the same about them. An essential part of life especially if you want the richness life has to offer.
Have you found your people? If you have you know how much comfort, and peace they bring to your life. And you are the same for them. If you haven’t found them yet see what you can do to find some trusted people to do life with. Find them through mutual interests and things you are passionate about like clubs, hobbies, church, organizations, etc. Your gut will tell you when you’ve hit the jackpot with someone. And it isn’t about numbers. You’re not trying to amass dozens, you need a few. You’re going to need to put yourself out there a bit. It isn’t likely they are going to show up at your front door. Is it harder now during COVID? You betcha. Maybe doing some research to find groups, places you can check out once the pandemic is over is a good place to start.
*And while we didn’t get into her funny side you can see it in full display in this photo. Heather is a very amusing, playful woman.*
Strong.
Grounded.
Intentional.
— Heather
Imago Dei
Thoughts from Finding Your People
I have found my people. Some have stayed for years and others for a season as Heather described. And still others are newer. There is something deeply comforting about knowing, really knowing, you are loved as you are, for who you are, imperfect and all. But what about all the people out there who are not your people? You may be acquainted with them, work with them, cross paths with them, not have much in common with them, or not even know them. They are the people out there.
So what am I talking about? If we’re being honest we will be aware we form opinions, make snap decisions about people we meet, people we read about, people we don’t really know. Drawing conclusions based on our own thoughts we quickly have an inner monologue with ourselves: Why does he do that? What is she saying by that? How can they think that way? How could anyone feel that way? How could they vote for him?
We are coming from our own head - our opinions, our values, out taste and preferences. Right there we need to acknowledge is where we start. Ok, imperfect, partial, biased. Where do we go next? Usually we size people up, form that assumption and typically take people at face value. Or if we learn a little more we may conclude this person is _____________ (fill in the blank). Sometimes the blank is filled with goodness and sometimes it is filled with thinking less of someone because they are different from you. Face it. We all do this to some degree or another.
I have caught myself doing this, I am less than pleased to announce. If we’re truthful I think we would say we all do this as it seems to be human nature. Some of it is valuable in discerning and being wise about the relationships we want to forge and invest in. But sometimes we are far too critical. Then there are the cases where we decide, through experience, the character of that person does not align with our values. And I know this is an OK, healthy process. We need to differentiate between having differing opinions and lumping people into a category because they have those opinions. And thinking less of them because they do.
This whole concept really crystallized for me during the most divisive election year I can recall. (Not to mention deep racial injustice, Covid: mask, or not to mask, debates.) Family members not speaking to each other because of who they were voting for. Rants and raves on social media and in mainstream media about all of it. One day I was listening to my favorite podcast (after this one), the Vox Podcast with Mike Erre, and he talked about what he says to himself in times of disagreement, division, of thinking his view is right/better, etc. than another. He says Imago Dei.
Imago Dei. What does it mean? If you don’t know much Latin or have never heard this phrase before it means image of God. Originally a theological term, applied uniquely to humans, which denotes the symbolical relation between God and humanity. (Source pbs.org.) So why am I choosing it as this week’s blog post?
Because we need constant reminding, each and every person, even the ones I am not fond of or won’t vote for, are made in God’s image. And I can take it a step further. God loves that person as much as he loves me. I follow Mike’s lead and now I say Imago Dei whenever I catch myself thinking my opinion, values, are in any way superior to another person’s whether it be about something deep or shallow. I say it. I’ve got to tell you it makes a world of difference. It levels me out and humbles me back to where I belong. Equal. Made in his image. Loved.
The same is true for you.
Imago Dei -
to believe that our worth comes not from what we do, but from the One whose image we were made in.
