Have you ever wondered how much of your life you're actually choosing—and how much you're just accepting?
Who am I, and what do I actually want?
Kara Paris, is a wife, mom, and newly certified life coach who believes we are continually becoming, evolving, and discovering who we were meant to be.
She has a particular passion for helping women who've experienced betrayal. But our conversation goes beyond betrayal into something every one of us can relate to.
Yeah, this happened, the unthinkable, now what? How do I move forward with these thoughts and feelings?
So, we talk about the power of our thoughts, the influence of our attitudes, and why accepting our circumstances doesn't mean resigning ourselves to them.
Kara Paris is our guest this week on Unabashed You, in the series Now What, God? Discovering Your Next Assignment.
You're not done yet. Not even close.
This is Unabashed You. Let’s get into it.
You can find Kara on Instagram at Kara Paris Coaching.
Loyal. Fun. Compassionate.
— Kara Paris
I am a Coach
Thoughts from Yeah, it Happened. Now What?
It seems we end up coaching on things we have been through. Maybe not exclusively, but the experiences we have can give us insight, and maybe even a special soft spot for people behind us who will go through something similar. Kara did not specifically talk about being betrayed herself, but I think we can read between the lines.
The same would be true of the other coaches we’ve had on UY recently. Nicole wants to help stay-at-home moms. Sue wants to help women with ADHD. Mel wants to help companies maximize their efforts. Danae wants to help parents with newborns. Heidi wants to help corporate executives. Becky wants to help midlife women find purpose.
Taking what you have been through and wanting to be there for another is a gift. It is a gift for the person receiving and it is also a gift for the person giving. After a session with a client the other day, Ron asked me how it was. Great! He said You say that every time. I am excited for you liking this so much. And it’s true. That’s how I feel - exhilarated and edified.
When I see a client have that moment of clarity, that moment of insight, they become visibly changed. They appear lighter in countenance, and freer as if that was something that could be translated tangibly. I can’t explain it better than that. Then their words are something along the lines of I hadn’t thought of it that way before or I see that I can change the way I am showing up in that situation or even This feels lighter.
Those changed thoughts change you. They change your reality; they transform you. Now let me be clear. They do not alter how other people behave, what they think, or how they feel. You have zero control over that anyway. Cleaning up your own thoughts to ones that serve you better will change the dance you have with the people in your life. When you change the dance steps on your end it just might shift how they show up too. That’s a bonus but not one to be counted on.
That’s the beauty of this kind of work. I get it now. After 9 months of training, learning concepts, practicing them on dozens of people, I see the value in my own life, for them and for me. I can hardly believe I get to do this. And that is what you want for your third act. Purpose. Service. Fulfillment.
I can say that now. I am a coach. No imposter syndrome here. I will use these skills in my third act and leave little sprinkles of light wherever invited to do so.
Change your thoughts and empowerment follows.
— Love what is
